4 weeks in Boulder

So... today it's official... 4 weeks in Boulder... In these 4 weeks I have, found a place to live, found a job, tried to do some hiking, found a short term rental to get me thru to my official rental, and have done A LOT of shopping at Target! Boulder is a pretty cool town... I have managed to find my way around... it's small enough to do that... it's small enough that, if you see a unique character in one place... you notice them when you see them again in another place... The Flatirons are beautiful... The front range is breathtaking... each day, as I'm on my way to work, I look to my left, and see these amazing mountains as a back drop to life here... as I sit at the front desk of the DDs office and answer phones, I watch the storm clouds come over the mountains... but... it is lonely... I realized, after the 2nd week, why I was at Target everyday... It's a place that feels familiar to me... It reminds me of home... I can appreciate now, that the journey here, was the easy part... I thought that was the adventure... Nope... this... trying to create a life here, not knowing anyone... is the adventure... and it is the hardest thing I have ever done... Most days, I am excited by the prospect... I am comforted by the sight of the mountains and the sky... I have lunch most days at Whole Foods... and sit out with a book, eat and look at the mountains...But I will admit, I have had my breakdowns... I'm a social creature... I know that about me... I like people, I like time alone as well... but I also need social interactions... and that is just not here yet... Back home I had the choice of whether to be alone or not... here...no choice... alone it is... Maybe that's part of the test... to see if I really can "be alone" maybe that's what I need to prove to myself... I can "be alone", I can create a life that is mine... hmmmm.... well I am optimistic... most days... but after 4 weeks... the beauty of the mountains, the clear sky... the crisp air... is great... but ... I miss my life... I miss my friends... I miss people to go out with... I have driven across 2/3-3/4 of the country myself... I've learned to go to dinner alone... I've learned to go sight seeing alone... I've learned to go to festivals and fairs alone... I haven't learned to go to a bar alone yet... but I find that I miss doing those things with a friend. I miss conversations with friends... thank goodness friends from home still do call me... so I still have those conversation... I hope they don't dwindle all together... I have a great opportunity to explore here, and I am doing that, this is something totally new... and I do believe new is good... but as my brother said to me... "You're a homey... get out and have fun!" I realize that I am a homey... and I'm trying to get out and have fun... but ... I miss FRIENDSHIP!! I didn't realize how hard that would be for me. I thought that I'm an outgoing person... I would make friends... and I feel positive that I will... but... not yet... not in 4 weeks...
so while I feel like I've accomplished alot in these 4 weeks... there is sooo much more to go...
I have faith that it will come... I'm open to the possibilites of the world... I recognize that I can't go home... that I'm out here to create a home ... a life... I'm in a funny, in between place at the moment... A woman without a home... without a place to belong to... I feel it's out there waiting for me... I know it... I just have to find it... I just have to make it... or maybe... I just have to be and allow it to come to me...
4 weeks in Boulder... more to come